Opinions have existed since Adam and Eve; the downside of our day is that everyone with an opinion has a microphone. If you have ever read my blog you will know that I have a few opinions of my own (please note the heavy sarcasm). But not all opinions are created equal--mine included. Having said that, I have always strived to have the information necessary to back up my thoughts. Based in research, personal experience or both, I have always sought to ask questions first, seek information and then offer an educated opinion. It is incredibly frustrating to me to live in a world where those who are loudest are often the most wrong. The idea that one has a platform does not give one the moral right to spew nonsense or rage-bait; yet we are drowning in those very things. It is my sincere belief that it is a serious responsibility to offer an opinion based on research and facts. It is equally important and acceptable to say, "I don't know the answer" and do further work until a clearer picture forms. The following is my opinion, based on those principles:
As with most anything in our current cultural climate, the horrifying case of Lindsay Clancy, has become politicized. Everyone has an opinion and we have become entrenched in our judgments and in our tribe. I have listened and watched the progression of this trial for weeks until I cannot take it anymore. What alarms me most is what I haven't heard. I have not heard enough honest questioning. I have not heard enough compassion for the victims--which may include Ms. Clancy. This is an incredibly awful and complex situation that in my opinion does not have any black and white answers. But first and foremost, my heart is broken for those innocent babies and their father. Regardless of what happens with Lindsay in the legal system, her life is over. And yes, I have compassion for her. I cannot in any way, shape or form condone nor excuse her actions. For the rest of her natural life, she will live with the fact that she killed her children and the self-induced paralysis she caused in her suicide attempt.
I am galled by the women who have seemingly begun to worship Ms. Clancy as if post-partum depression is an excuse to give up and do something unthinkable or heinous to your children. It is truly disgusting. Where is the wholesale condemnation for that? She has admitted guilt and on some level is accountable for her crime. What I don't know is if that is First-degree-murder-guilty or manslaughter-guilty. PPD is real and we will never know what really was going on in her head. Even the experts who testified in her trial fail to agree on what happened, what PPD is and its duration. IF women start using this case as a wholesale excuse to murder "difficult"children, I will be the first to call them out. Must I say that PPD is not an excuse to kill your children?
I have recently heard the argument that if women are going to use PPD as an excuse to commit crime then they should never be trusted to hold important positions. Seriously?! It only occurs in 12-13% of women who are post-partum (thus the name). By that logic, the men who commit rape because they just can't control their hormones, must be judged by the same rule. When I stop hearing the logical fallacy and repugnant justification "boys will be boys", then you can talk to me about female hormones making women irresponsible. Personal accountability for our individual choices and actions is the only appropriate way to judge anyone. Neither all men nor all women are the same and this stupid argument gets us absolutely nowhere.
Here's what I do know. If you have never had the agonizing experience of trying to navigate our "mental health care system", then you don't have the first earthly clue what you are talking about when it comes to how awful and near-useless it is. If you have never had nor had someone close to you have PPD, then you don't know what you are talking about. If you are a man and have never had the joy of experiencing menstruation, cramps, PMS, endometriosis, infertility, pregnancy, miscarriage, or menopause you have NO CLUE what it is like to be a woman. You have NO IDEA what our hormones do to us on a daily basis and the VAST majority of us just deal with it. As near as I can tell, men never experience the hormonal fluctuations incident to being female, unless they are taking steroids or need testosterone replacement therapy. So without the benefit of any of these experiences, most of the opinions I am hearing are utterly useless.
I also know that our nation's medical system is failing miserably. I predicted this (along with many others) when Obamacare was passed (go back and read what I wrote way back then). Everything I predicted has come true. One of the worst failures of our system is our complete inability to deal with the plague of mental health illnesses we have in our country. Don't believe me? Look in every moderately large or large city in our country. The vast majority of our homeless population is a victim of mental illness or addiction (which is a form of mental illness). Our culture has turned our backs on these people and have allowed them to live in squalor in our streets, ruin our cities, endanger people's lives, enable their unhinged behavior and repeatedly commit crimes of all sorts. There is no accountability. Instead, cities like Seattle provide them with foils and needles or have a certified nurse inject their drugs for them. What are we doing?! Most of us would have a fit if an animal was treated that way; while at the same time looking away when human beings live like this. It is inexcusable.
Even if you are lucky enough to have a support system to try to help you navigate the mental health care system, it takes unbelievable commitment and stamina to find the help you need. The lack of qualified providers is epic. And if you live in a small state like Wyoming, where thanks to Obamacare, you have exactly one insurance provider to choose from, you have no options. If WY doesn't have the provider you need, sucks to be you. You might be able to find a doctor in a nearby state, but then you have to fight the insurance company for payment. Even though we have tele-medicine, the rules about crossing state lines are arcane and assinine. Any physician licensed as a doctor in the U.S. should be able to practice medicine in any U.S. state. They all have to meet the same training requirements, but the loss of revenue to the states in licensing fees keeps physicians trapped behind state lines, exasperating already terrible shortages.
If you do indeed find mental health care, there is nothing simple about it. Diagnosis is long and difficult and often wrong. Finding a therapist to meet needs is grueling and challenging. It requires more then just a body for an appointment--it requires a good fit and buy-in from the patient. Perhaps most damning is our nationwide dependence on a prescription to solve every medical problem. In most cases, drugs used for mental health challenges are very difficult to work with. They take effect slowly, they leave your system slowly, they have tons of side-effects and drug interactions and worst of all, they often can make depression worse or cause suicidal thoughts. Anyone who has ever used these drugs knows how horrifyingly slow the process is to find an effective medication and even then, sometimes said drug will just stop working inexplicably over time.
Going back to Ms. Clancy. Many argue that premeditation signifies she is guilty of first-degree murder. What we don't know is if her research was to bring about her own death or the death of her children. Of course, neither is justifiable. Furthermore, the ability to premeditate a crime does not signify either guilt or sanity. We don't know if she was or wasn't sane. Clearly innumerable crimes have been committed by those who are not in their right mind but still had the capacity for forethought. So many people are currently arguing that women can never be taken seriously again if the "female hormone" defense is successful. Why make this a female issue? Insanity takes over men and women and we have decided as a society, that as a result, some people are not responsible for their actions. Is that the case here? I have no idea. But rejecting the very idea simply because it's due to female hormones, seems dangerously un-serious. The more important issue is why she was failed so miserably by those that should have helped her.
She was prescribed 13 different medications over a four-month period by various medical providers. No-one--not even a pharmacist bothered to check for drug interactions or address the known potential problems with anti-depressants. No one medical provider was the point person for her care. No medical provider bothered to slow this runaway train and find out what was going on. If I were her ex-husband, I would sue every medical provider she saw for malpractice. Writing a new prescription and kicking her out the door is not treatment--is it abdication and failure. She was seeking help and the system failed her completely.
It also sickens and angers me to participate and observe a medical system that almost completely ignores the needs of women. We are not the same as men for a litany of reasons, but biologically we cannot be treated the same by science. As evidenced by the never-ending advertising for ED medications, science can solve problems when it is highly motivated. I cannot help but believe that if men suffered the female hormone ravages already listed above, the scientists would have solved these problems decades ago. But because the vast majority of women suck it up, gut it out, muddle through, don't complain and survive--our medical needs are routinely ignored. PPD is NOT the same as schizophrenia. It is temporary; it is treatable. But there's also too much that we don't know about it and too often women with it do not have sufficient support.
Ms. Clancy's husband did everything he knew to try and help. Extended family tried to help, but they didn't know enough. None of this is their fault. In many ways the scariest part of mental health problems is not knowing what to do. Often your best efforts are inadequate. And people who suffer the ravages of mental illness just want to feel "normal", they just want to be better. As a result, they often mask their behavior--not out of dishonesty but because they so desperately want to see progress for themselves and their families.
What's the bottom line? I don't know what the appropriate punishment or consequence is for Ms. Clancy. But there must be one. Even in our highly flawed justice system, the idea of her walking away without any kind of punishment is unthinkable. This is one of the most tragic and unnecessary events of which I have ever heard. But here is what I do know: I know those babies are safe in the arms of Jesus and that God can heal their poor father's broken heart. I know that if my daughter or daughter-in-law ever tells me that they are having thoughts of suicide or killing their children that I will move in with them until I am absolutely sure that the PPD has passed. I know that only God Himself can accurately judge Ms. Clancy and know what was truly in her heart and mind that day. I know that we must do a better job as a society of facing the mental health crisis we are drowning in--head-on. We cannot continue to ignore it and kick the can down the road because we are spiraling as a nation.
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